愛情解密之二十：Communication Problem

“There was this Asian lady married to an American gentleman and they lived in Honolulu. The poor lady was not very proficient in English, but managed to communicate with her husband. The real problem arose whenever she had to shop for groceries.

One day, she went to the butcher and wanted to buy pork legs. She didn't know how to put forward her request, and in desperation, lifted up her skirt to show her thighs. The butcher got the message and the lady went home with pork legs.

The next day, she needed to get chicken breasts. Again, she didn't know how to say, and so she unbuttoned her blouse to show the butcher her breast. The lady got what she wanted.

The 3rd day, the poor lady needed to buy sausages. Unable to find a way to communicate this, she brought her husband to the store...



What were you thinking? Helloooooooooo, her husband speaks English!!”


周末，照例，還是以笑話開始。首先我們必須聲明，我們引用這個笑話沒有任何影射或諷刺的意思。對可能產生的不安或不便，我們深表遺憾。

現在這種cross-cultural marriage越來越多。我們很容易發現我們身邊的朋友或認識的人與異族的通婚。不能簡單一句話概括說這種婚姻就一定不幸福，而隻有和同種族的人結婚才會幸福。這樣難免落入偏見或偏激的陷阱。隻能說，這種婚姻要麵對的困難和挑戰更多，畢竟兩人之間存在著文化和語言上的巨大落差，而這些差異往往都是通往幸福之路的絆腳石。

像笑話中的兩人可以有幸福的婚姻嗎？這種完全無法有深層次語言交流的兩個人能嗎？

這個也不能一概而論。不可否認，深層次的溝通和交流是兩人之間相互理解，相互了解，相互信任的基礎。缺少了這些，婚姻或愛情往往有如一潭死水，激情過後，容易變成隻為瑣碎的生活小事操忙。不要說難以產生夫唱妻合的共鳴，就連夫唱婦隨也很難。這樣的婚姻或愛情確實不容易持久。

但是，並非人人都需要或喜歡這種深層次的溝通和交流。有些人就是“Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day。” 誠然，我們生活中有一部分人並不像各位這樣有很強的思考和分析能力，他們比較簡單些，或常常半天也放不出一個屁來。對於這種人，深層次的溝通和交流基本上是多餘的，而且往往會讓他們頭疼不已。

絕大多數的女人和相當一部分男人都喜歡溝通和交流，也有少部分的女人和一部分的男人不喜歡。如果你是一個感情豐富，喜歡交流的人，最好不要找一個完全不喜歡，或根本沒有辦法和你進行思想上溝通的另一半。這樣情變的可能性很大，男女都一樣。

So until next time，in your opinion, what is the most common universal language?也就是，你們認為世界上最通的語言是什麽呢？