再貼一首舊的先中文再翻譯 dream 留言很讓我感動

夢

 

畫廊裏

一把躺著的小提琴旁

我在等你

而你的影子很長

你的臉龐落在了琴弦上

你的腳卻頂著半掩的門

耳邊一個男人在反複地問

你在哪裏

我回答

她在等你

 

Dream

In a gallery,
next to a violin lying on the floor,
I'm waiting for you.
Your shadow’s long,
your face casts on the strings,
but your foot levers the door ajar.
A man repeatedly asks by my ears-
where you are?
My answer-
She’s waiting for you.
© a year ago, xx   
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Comment - What did you think? 
  
 

Likes: Femfem, Jenny Middleton, The Dark Faery, Aurore O. BoulanTo reply, click a comment.

Aurore O. Boulan - Visual, Arithmetic. Reminds me of Tom Wait's song ''Alice''. The final interjection, after the painted remembrance, and longing, calls for spirits to linger in hopes of requited affection, and a mutual sharing of their plight. I like it very much. If I had to give any advice...Perhaps I'd only invite you to continue on further this path of exquisite balance between setting and action. Dialogue is a very interesting tool in poetry. I implore you to explore it, and listen to the inner voices of inspiration. Muse or poet.

Great posta year ago   x

 

Jenny Middleton - I love the symbolism you build up in this poem to convey a sense of dream. a year ago   x

 

The Dark Faery - I like your poem.  The flow moves at a good pace.  Good imagery, I can see the shadows and faces. 

 

 

Femfem - Dream! Dream!! Dream!!!
I thoroughly enjoyed your depth. Thank you!a year ago   x