Command to my heart ---- 繼續練習英文寫作

本文內容已被 [ 阿童木牧 ] 在 2014-11-07 19:33:53 編輯過。如有問題,請報告版主或論壇管理刪除.



Command to my heart


Sailing in a stormy dark sea with my heart sitting aside
Giant waves crash and wind roars fiercely wide
Boat is shaking, dashing and spinning like taking a sky scream roller coaster ride

My heart, my heart , deep inside
Here is the command for you to decide
To forget, to delete and to erase with the graceful pride
Bring back the sweet night with clean breeze blowing gently outside

Master, Master, My dear master cried
I am afraid to tell that someone has been denied
Once upon a moon night with high tide
You have given up your ability to command with your heart being untied
...........

所有跟帖: 

一韻到底!讚阿童好詩! -膠老爺- 給 膠老爺 發送悄悄話 膠老爺 的博客首頁 (0 bytes) () 11/07/2014 postreply 05:35:30

Excellent work, see inside -逢緣隨意- 給 逢緣隨意 發送悄悄話 逢緣隨意 的博客首頁 (327 bytes) () 11/07/2014 postreply 06:50:53

also -逢緣隨意- 給 逢緣隨意 發送悄悄話 逢緣隨意 的博客首頁 (19 bytes) () 11/07/2014 postreply 07:15:20

拜讀。。。 -沁文----古來客- 給 沁文----古來客 發送悄悄話 沁文----古來客 的博客首頁 (0 bytes) () 11/07/2014 postreply 07:20:39

真好!語法似稍有點小問題,“ sits” 似應為“sitting"或“set"(with 不能接一個完整的句子); “ roar -阿留- 給 阿留 發送悄悄話 阿留 的博客首頁 (257 bytes) () 11/07/2014 postreply 11:43:17

這個練習做得好!! -wenxuecity18- 給 wenxuecity18 發送悄悄話 wenxuecity18 的博客首頁 (0 bytes) () 11/07/2014 postreply 11:54:59

多謝大家讀詩, 多謝逢緣兄和阿留詩兄幫忙看語法, 忙著寫句子和詩意,哈,忘了語法! 阿童繼續練習! :)))都改了! -阿童木牧- 給 阿童木牧 發送悄悄話 阿童木牧 的博客首頁 (0 bytes) () 11/07/2014 postreply 19:38:10

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