Excellent writing! May need a little tweak.

If I am wrong, just kick it aside. :)

what sets Ben apart is his attitude toward music and his students.
>>sets ***** apart 分開放, 隔離開
stand out : 突出; 顯眼, 超群
what makes Ben stand out is ....

We could tell from our initial acquaintance that Ben has an intrinsic love of playing the piano. (sounds a little awkward to me)
>>In the very first time we met Ben, he struck us favourably as a spirited young man who loves playing the piano from the bottom of his heart.

He encourages students' equality and initiation in the learning process.
>> He treats his students equally and encourages their own initiative in the learning process
initiation: 發起, 創始
initiative: 主動性, 首創精神

please don't hesitant to contact us. (minor grammar mistake)
>> please don't be hesitant to contact us.