湊了首兒歌。瞎湊了一首:)

來源: 2010-02-28 15:05:05 [博客] [舊帖] [給我悄悄話] 本文已被閱讀:

I walked across the Greenwood garden
looking for the road we always took
i sat on the meadow my heart was taken
though of you and of our joys we partook

dear friend, do you know how i miss you?
where have you gone?do you still play flue?


I looked around for the cherry tree
we engraved our names on the trunk
i touched the branch looking for the names
Is this the place that we've made wishes?

dear friend,do you know i care about you?
how have you been? do you still write haiku?



覺得rhyme有時真的影響表達。
比如,倒數第二段沒有考慮韻腳,正是完全是想要表達的意思。
其它地方為了rhyme,反而不是一開始想要寫的意思。