地道美國人改的，對還是不對？

這是我的笨拙原文：

The marching crowd somehow slowed down. I saw a long beard Santa Claus in his red suit and red hat with white fuzz.  He waved to the crowd while handing over coupons to them.

這是老美的道地英文：

The crowd seemed to part and slow just enough to see a Santa Claus with a long white beard. He had a beautiful red suit and really looked the part. He waved to the shoppers while handing out coupons.

可是加粗的那些我實在不能肯定是否正確；就算正確也不曉得是什麽意思。哪位有什麽看法？謝謝！