Fait Accompli
既成事實
And often the conclusions are very similar - the busier we get, the less time we make for sex, or when we do it can be less rewarding than we would like. And it's not just us, but our partners too.
A recent study in the UK, for example, showed that more than half the partners of people who worked more than 48 hours a week felt their sex lives were suffering as a result. Another third thought longer hours by one partner or the other were generally taking a toll on their relationship.
But does it have to always be the case that the harder we work, the less hard we're able to play?
Dr Ridwan Shabsigh, director of the Division of Urology at Maimonides Medical Center in Brooklyn, New York, says he has "absolutely" been encountering more instances of sexual dysfunction specifically due to stress or other work-related factors.
The author of Sensational Sex in Seven Easy Steps says the chemical effect of stress is a basic human reaction and that in high-pressure situations, it can be the driver for performance. But with today's executives - who will often need that adrenaline rush in their day-to-day business lives - having increasing demands on their time and energy, it is perhaps inevitable that something has to give.
Dr Shabsigh says there are three aspects of a busy work life that can contribute to sexual dysfunction:
Stress - for which coping mechanisms can include alcohol or over-eating, both of which clearly have an adverse impact on general health;
Overwork - especially, he says, in the financial world, where 70- or 80-hour work weeks are common; and
Travel - for executives who travel frequently on business, criss-crossing the country or regularly flying internationally can have a detrimental effect due to frequent jetlag and sleep disruption.
As another negative factor, Dr Shabsigh points to instances where executives who have to frequently entertain clients can end up drinking too much. And as a corresponding danger to alcohol consumption, he says that among high-powered women executives there has been an increase in the use of anti-depressants, which can lead to a lessening of desire.
Indeed, with the sexual side effects of these types of medications being well-known, it can appear as if some executives are making a choice between their high-powered career and a healthy sex life.
But Dr Shabsigh is optimistic that the "job vs. sex" dilemma can be overcome. In his book he says how people can rebalance their lives if they put their minds to it. "Our work life is not a fait accompli," he says.
What might be more difficult to conquer, however, is a feeling of "invincibility," which often accompanies high-level business performance. Dr Shabsigh says: "There's something in people that says: 'I can overwork my brain and my body, cut into my sleep, work late nights and weekends and still expect to have a normal sex life.' "
Yet if someone is able to have a high-level, high-success lifestyle in one aspect of their lives, it is probably only natural that they feel they should be able to maintain a successful sex life too.
"That's not unique to people of high achievement," says Dr Shabsigh, "We are all sexual beings."
And he says it is important that individuals look out for the warning signs that they might be encountering a broader problem with dysfunction. His website features a health calculator, which allows men to get a quick idea of how susceptible they may be to conditions that can lead to diminished sexual activity.
While older subjects can often see it as part of the aging process, Dr Shabsigh says younger patients will usually go through denial initially. "They'll say: Oh, I just couldn't perform this weekend … but next weekend will be better."
source: news.com.au
last accessed
June 01, 2007 12:00am
