這是油管鏈接：
如下是此段“單口相聲”的逐句“轉錄”：
Ready for a little free-speech in America? Because I will tell you something, if there was a theme to the news while we were off it would be no “joking”. No “joking”, there are people in the world they just don’t like people joking about them. You know, North Korea, they don’t like it, these assholes in Paris they shot cartoonists, they don’t like it, as a jokester I guess I have to say the world needs to stand as one and to quote the immortal Dick Cheney to say “go fuck yourself”. And let me tell you something, the incredibly courageous staff of this French magazine , Charlie Hebdo, I am probably pronouncing it wrong but we all know who they are, they said it loud and clear this week because they announced yesterday, not only will they put out the next edition on time, but with a million extra copies. Yeah, I mean, my heroes, compare that to Sony who pulled the “interview” after one on-line threat. Congratulation Sony, you put up less resistance than the French. Wow, they are the scaredy pants. They also shut down the production of next “Guardian of the Galaxy” movie because the raccoons complained about their portrayal.
The good news is the two brothers, who carried out this horrible attack today got their wish, they are martyrs, they were shot dead by French police. And the third jihadist, which is their accomplice, also shot dead, got this, maybe there is a god, in a kosher deli, I just hope the last thing went through this guy’s head, other than the sound of the bullets, was an old Jewish woman complaining the brisket was too fatty. Now we are learning more about these brothers who
carried out this attack, they are as everyone expected, Amish, well, you know what, Howard Dean said the other day, he said they are not Muslim terrorists, they are mass murders, he was going to say more but the elephant in the room sat on him. OK, we found out these two brothers were radicalized by a fanatical janitor. I love that, because you know what, a janitor he must have the inside
track on what God wants, because God made him a janitor, he would put out a fatwa on gum. Also, much like the Tsarnaev brothers of the Boston Bombing fame, they were pot heads, hey smoke weeds, but obviously not enough. I will tell you, far be it for me to make fun of religion, but only religion could ruin getting high and looking at cartoons. So, meanwhile this week over at Syria Isis be-headed a street magician, finally, we are on the same page, I have to think that Charlie Hebdo would like that joke. You know the death toll at the office would have much higher, except luckily it was Paris in the middle of the day, most people being at home having sex. Do you love it that everyone in America finally loving France again? Yes. Je aime la France. Even the conservatives, Senate republicans even considering changing the Freedom Fries back to French Fries. And all the politicians are getting into the act, Chris Christie, today pledged that he would eat a whole tray of chocolate éclairs, and Bill Clinton said he would proudly take part in ménage à trios.
說一點背景。Bill 是美國“自由派”裏麵最“自由”的一杆旗幟。他此刻的發言平台是有線電視HBO上每周五的“Real Time with Bill Maher”。Bill 生在一個天主教家庭，父親是天主教徒，母親是猶太裔。他自己小時候隨父為天主教教徒。後來成為無神論者，而且是最大聲的無神論者，曾製作電影“Religulous”，拿各種宗教開涮。Bill 是言論自由的強力捍衛者，大麻無害論的時刻推銷員，共和黨與美國“紅州”最“可恨”的對手。911前曾主持電視節目“政治不正確”。911發生，Bill 說了一段“不合時宜”的話，結果被電視公司開鍘。他到現在一直耿耿於懷，說他是唯一為911負起責任的美國人。 Bill的這種喜劇，就是要“得罪人”。誰都不冒犯就沒有真正的喜劇了。當然，得罪權勢與主流是美國喜劇藝人的驕傲，得罪“弱勢”就是狗腿子了。Bill 以拿宗教開涮為己任，幾乎無天主教不成笑話。可是，穆斯林在美國是弱勢，拿穆斯林開玩笑是一種不可為的禁忌。Bill 曾在一期自己的節目上“探討”穆斯林，結果被“自由派”的“同誌”大肆修理批判。可是，社會也得想一想，當一個“弱勢”弱到不能批評時，這個“弱勢”是不是真那麽“弱”？ 有了這些背景，上麵那段視頻就容易理解些。再解釋幾個細節。 Bill在HBO的節目每年11月到來年1月初暫停，這期是重新開始後的第一個節目，正趕上巴黎恐襲。 Bill是原副總統切尼的“天敵”，整天拿切尼開涮，此處源引切尼是一種不可解釋的笑話。 Put up less resistance 是拿二戰中的法國人開涮。Scaredy pants 是個動畫角色，被嚇壞了的典型。 Kosher Deli是猶太食品店，Brisket是一種猶太式牛肉食品，其中的穆斯林與猶太笑話本老漢不會解釋，*_*。 Bill因為上次說穆斯林被修理，此處特意說Amish而自嘲。 Howard Dean 是民主黨的左派，曾參選總統初選，Bill 的“戰友”。Bill 這裏在諷刺他的“政治正確”。 後麵Bill有意隻說巴黎的兩名恐嫌被一位“清潔工”給“極端化”了而不說這位“清潔工”是一名自造自封的伊斯蘭“教士”。（下麵的兩個鏈接是兩名恐嫌與這位“清潔工”關係的解釋。） Fatwa是一種伊斯蘭法條文本的意思。 Bill 說他與ISIS同感是一種反諷。 Freedom Fries是911後美國國會的極端政客嫌法國“反恐”不力，把法國炸薯條給改成自由炸薯條了。 Chris Christie是共和黨籍的新澤西州州長，有點胖，^_^。Chocolate éclairs是一道法國甜點。 Ménage à trios既然和Bill Clinton 有關，您去猜意思吧。
Bill Maher 及“Charlie Hebdo”版的笑話，與咱國文化在許多方麵格格不入，這就是所謂的文化衝突吧。
最後，再說一遍，Je suis Charlie. |
